Forgive and forget?

Often, you might hear the old expression “forgive and forget”. When people tell you this, it’s usually them trying to encourage forgiveness, but as human beings, we can’t be forgiving all the time. To me, “forgive and forget” sounds more like this: “if someone wrongs you, forget all about it”.

It’s quite odd that some Christians would advocate it, since the phrase “forgive and forget” is virtually nowhere to be found the Bible, though forgiveness is preached often in the Bible. Forgiveness, for me, is only the best option if you don’t want to hold a grudge against someone who wronged you. In any other case, if I were wronged, I’d want to be compensated for it. Wouldn’t you?

Also, just because forgive someone doesn’t mean you should forget how you were wronged. I certainly wouldn’t forget it if I was wronged, so why would you? It’s pretty clear that the “forgive and forget” credo is pretty much designed to keep people docile, but it’s not going to work, for there things out there that simply cannot be forgiven. At some point in your life, you’ll know what I’m talking about.


6 thoughts on “Forgive and forget?

  1. For me, there definitely is a Christian influence to what I believe about forgiveness. But I won’t go there since that’s already been discussed.
    From a non-religious perspective, forgetting is a way to let go of pain. Forgetting is a way to cut off the control someone else might have over me (I’d rather not let someone else control my feelings by holding a grudge). But that’s just my opinion. Cheerio

    • Yours is actually a perfectly reasonable argument. I actually think that the Christians could have made a better case for “forgive and forget” if they actually based it on letting go of pain, rather than ridding yourself of your natural desire for vengeance.

  2. Sorry, due to the subject which this blog was written about and words “philosophy , religion” at the top of the page I thought that perhaps you were a Christian voicing your opinions about forgiveness. I apologize for jumping to that conclusion. My main point was that just about any can be forgiven if a person is humble enough.

  3. Jesus cried out to the Father to forgive the people who had tortued him to death while he was on the cross. If we are to be like Jesus, then we must be willing to show a forgiving heart or at least request that God shows a forgiving heart when we are not yet able to, even when we are in the midst if the wrong doing.

    • That’s fine for you, but why would I want to be like Jesus? Why would I let people walk all over me just because “God” commanded it? Those are the questions that plenty of Christians don’t deal with because it threatens their faith. If I were a Christian, I wouldn’t try to be like Jesus, because I would do good my own way.

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